Take a seat. I want to tell you something that may come as a shock to you. Are you ready?
Our weaknesses and our strengths are the same thing! I know what you are thinking. How can that be? When it comes to character qualities they are two sides of the same coin. The qualities within ourselves that we often view as the worst ones to have are the very same qualities that when nurtured and refined become our leading strengths. I want to give you a couple of examples to illustrate this point.
A few years ago I was sitting in a class and the teacher was introducing this concept of our weaknesses and strengths actually being the same thing. She invited us to take out a piece of paper and have two columns, on one side we were to write our “weakness” and then on the other side of that label we were to write out 5 strengths that could develop from that “weakness” or unfavorable quality. We were to write the first word that came to mind. I wrote “bossy”.
Now let me tell you a little bit about this thorn in my side, I mean, bossyness. When I was in kindergarten my mom went to parent teacher conference to learn all about how her wonderful daughter was doing in school. The teacher tells her I’m doing great academically but that she is a little concerned about my lack of friends. She and mom discuss and mom come homes and talks to me and a conversation ensues where mom tells me that perhaps a reason I’m having trouble making friends is because I am a bit bossy. I, with all the seriousness I possess, replied “I’m not too bossy, they just don’t do what I tell them too.”
So for the next 25 (yes 25) years, every time I heard the word bossy I cringed. I had very little boundaries and had a hard time making decisions around other people because of this one word. I was paranoid and paralyzed by fear. And whenever this bossiness leaked out, like a stuffed sausage, I would hide in shame and replay everything that transpired like a bad record. Needless to say, bossy and I did not have a healthy relationship. Here I am sitting in class…. it felt like now or never., either I conquer this word once and for all or crumble.
On the left I wrote “bossy” and on the right I wrote “leader”, “teacher”, “one who knows what they want”, “someone who can empower others”, “helpful advice giver”, “forthright”, “confident” … do you see where I am going here? All of the sudden this skill that I thought was such an awful no good, very bad thing all of the sudden became this amazing quality that I couldn’t wait to grab onto. I could see that this was a beautiful gift to have. I could see that this gift paired with my public speaking ability could enable me to help other people, I could see that this gift could enable me to guide and direct a large family, I could see that this gift drew people to me…. my weakness could become my strength.
Just by one simple exercise I was able to open the energy to move into my strength. All I had to do was open my consciousness just a little to see what this really was. Our weakness are our strengths.
Second example. Often times we take our weaknesses and we dislike them so much that we wish to cast them off, get rid of them, throw them as far away from our body as we possibly can and never see or mention them again. Right?
When we do that it’s like taking a rock, a big, heavy, ugly, rough rock, attaching a rubber-band to it and throwing it as far from us as we can. Now what do you think is going to happen when you throw that rock? Yep, you got it. That rock is going to come flying back to you and hit you harder than ever. (Can you see how sometimes those weaknesses have caused more pain than they ‘should’ have?)… so now think of it this way. What would happen if you took that rock, that’s jagged and rough, and put it in a rock tumbler? Have you seen a rock tumbler? It’s loud and slow and mixed with water and other smaller rocks, but do you know what it does? It refines that rock. It smooths it and turns it into a beautiful sparkly stone.
When we can view our weaknesses as if they are rocks that could use a little smoothing around the edges then we can allow the lessons in life to refine our weakness and develop into our strengths. My bossiness didn’t go away in day. I didn’t instantly have new friends or become a fearless leader, but what I did have was opportunities to refine my skills. Opportunities to learn how others are empowered (hint hint it’s not through telling them what to do.) and opportunities to practice and learn friend-shipping skills.
As you go through life and you recognize weakness that you have and a desire to change; approach your weakness with a little love and understanding. Be patient with yourself and recognize as you see these changes taking place. Often the people who are quick to anger possess the greatest capacity to love, the person who feels a bit too judgemental may hold the greatest capacity for empathy and the person who is the shyest may have the fullest capacity to understand the feelings of others.
Be kind to yourself. Take 5 minutes a do this simple exercise. Write your weakness and then 5 strengths that can develop. Then sit back and watch how you naturally and almost effortlessly begin to move into the energy of that strength and that weakness is transformed into a beautiful precious stone.
What you focus on expands. Wherever your time, energy, finances, emotions go you are creating. If you focus on stress… guess what? It’s like sending a message to the universe, “hey, I like this, send me more.”
When you focus on joy the same is true, you are telling the world “I am happy, I love being happy, help me find more ways to create happiness”
Years ago I was feeling the pressure of an expanding family and am income that seemed small in proportion to the number of people it was providing for. Enter stress mode. Stress mode for me makes me turn to control. I began to believe that if somehow I could control our spending more, track where it was going that it would solve the problem of not having enough. So I spent days writing a budget, fiddling with numbers, printing it to look just write and then I proudly displayed my masterpiece prominently onto the refrigerator as a constant reminder. (Looking back it wasn’t so much as a reminder of the budget as a sign telling me that I wasn’t good enough). The thought was that if I wrote down every purchase then I could see the incoming and outgoing. Fast forward two months… it was worse. Money was tighter, food was scarcer, happiness was nonexistent. What happened?
By placing that constant reminder on the fridge it was like a straight shot to the universe telling me to live in scarcity. That there isn’t enough. I had such a tight grip on the idea that there wasn’t enough, there would never be enough that the universe was just doing what I told it to do; “prove to me that there really isn’t enough for me.”
So, you know what I did. I ripped that paper down, expressed gratitude for all that I had learned and started a new. This time with a full expression of gratitude. Gratitude for the food in the pantry, the clothes in our closets and the beautiful home we lived in. I began to practice prayer before checking the bank account or going to the store. I started telling my husband how grateful I was that he worked so hard to provide for our family.
And our financial situation improved… and not only did the checkbook start to balance, but we were able to payboff debt and within months my husband received a promotion in the form of a new job.
When we focus on our blessings we are telling the world “I am grateful! Send me more.”
If you are interested in learning more about this and practicing it for yourself I recommend reading the short little book of experiments called “E Squared”.
Listen to your body. When negative energy doesn’t have an outlet it stores in the body and disease thrives on it. A great way to clear out negative energy is writing. Write your past, present, thoughts, feelings, memories…. give your body an outlet. Let the negative flow through you rather than taking up permanent residence
I few months ago I presented at a conference and was able to share with my students where in the body negative energy stores. In my practice I generally find this guide to be about 95% accurate.
Head and Neck: This is our Inspiration center, where we are connected to our Higher Power. In your neck is where stubborness and inflexibility will show up. So if you are feeling tight in the neck, ask yourself, “What perspective am I not seeing?”
Shoulders: Carrying burdens that aren’t ours. Empaths often feel heavy in their shoulders and slouch. When I feel my shoulders heavy it is a good time for me to reflect and ask myself, “Are any of my worries not mine? How about emotions? How about goals?” sometimes we find ourselves carrying the burdens of others in an effort to lighten their load. In theory this sounds like it would work, but the truth is that they still carry their burdens and you are just carrying empty negative energy. To clear this, Tell Yourself, “I don’t know what to do with this… God (or Higher Source) please carry this away.”
Arms: Very much tied to shoulders and often ties to experiencing life. Are we experiencing OUR life or are we experiencing it vicariously through another or are we experiencing it through a lens of beliefs and ‘shoulds’. For this one, ask yourself, “What part of life am I not fully present or enjoying?” and then listen for the answer.
Chest: From the bottom of your ribs to the bottom of your neck. LOVE… anything having to do with love, feeling unwanted, abandoned, a lack, unable to recognize love, inability to give or receive.
Abdomen: This is your ANGER center; bitterness, hate, unforgiveness, fear… and this can be your own as well as generational. Intestinal problems, kidney stones often find their roots in suppressed anger. A great remedy for this one is writing. Write your thoughts… just start and it will come to you. Then burn or dispose of the paper. Most times we don’t need to do anything with our anger other than validate the experiences and give it an outlet to leave our body.
Hips: These are where we point our direction in life and the support or lack of support in our path. Ask yourself, “Is the direction I am going one that is fulfilling, is it my true path? Are there any changes I want to make to point me in another direction? Am I supported? How do I feel supported or unsupported?” If you are feeling directionless or unsupported; connect to your higher power and you will be shown.
Knees: Very simply put- Perfectionism. If we are striving or feeling buried in should’s and should nots that energy very often shows up in our knees. Knees carry the weight of our body and yet are to be flexible and moveable with the waves of life. When faced with inflexibility and wanting to control outcome, or guilt for not doing enough, the energy very often finds a home in the knees. (our personal Pride can also manifest itself here)
Fingers and Toes: Details of life, often over thinking how things are going to work out. Not trusting the process.
A Wise Chiropractor once taught me that when pain is moving through our body and to different areas that low vibration (negative energy) is looking for a way out, and usually will find one. It’s when we have localized pain that doesn’t change is where the negative energy can breed disease.
If you are asking yourselves these questions and still feeling stuck in your lower vibrational energy, then call me. Come meet with me and together we can quickly identify the causes and raise you to a Higher Vibration. When you are living at a higher vibration you are healthier, happier and connected to Heaven and Earth.
I get asked a lot about what I do… I think this simple video sums it up. I remove people’s nails
I realize, now that I look back over the years that I have always had the intuitive gift of nail removal, but it wasn’t until more recently that I recognized that it can be problematic if I yank someone’s nail out and they aren’t ready.
Thanks to Simply Healed I am in more control of my intuitive gifts and can easily recognize when someone is ready and I trust that they show up in my life at exactly the right time. I can help them pull their own nail out and then quickly repair the hole with love and light.
I hope you enjoy this comical little video as much as I do!